A few years ago, noted anthropologist and new age philosopher Marcus E. Callaghan published his third non-fiction novel (which emulated it's predecessors and went on to become an international bestseller in the next few weeks). Unlike the first two, this one didn't deal with lace underwear and satin drapes. This was called "Man as a sexual being: When instinct overrides intellect". In one of the more famous passages, the 'protagonist' Harold Bernstein - a successful Psychology professor and vigilant policeman - is asked by a congregation of Neo-Respiressionist Anglistians he was addressing, to underline the main difference in his opinion between the male and female psyche. His succinct, but richly insightful reply was, "If Man is a repressed sexual volcano waiting to explode, then Woman is zucchini augratin."

Which is so bloody true. I was eating the very dish at Tom's D the other day and the only thing I could say after flicking the last bit of gravy off the plate with a nifty fork maneuver was, "Damn, I swear this stuff tastes exactly like Sarah Jessica-Parker"

Kids, kids, pteradactyls....please. Let me speak my mind here for a bit:

The time has come
To concede
That I have been stymied.
My world is in peril
And
There is nothing left for me to do,
Except,
Retire into private life
And wash hogs.